If your husband wants out of the marriage, he may feel that his only recourse is divorce. Many women are surprised to learn that her spouse is not happy and that she would rather end the marriage than try to fix things. If it’s gotten to this point and you still desperately want to keep your family together, there are things you can do. You may believe that unless he is willing to try too, the relationship is doomed. That is not necessarily the case.

As difficult as it may seem, when your husband wants out of the marriage, you need to look at how he has been behaving. Men rarely suddenly decide that they are no longer happy. Instead, it is a gradual progression. If she has noticed a change in her husband and she chose to ignore it rather than address it, some of the blame for her marriage problems falls squarely on her own shoulders. Obviously you can’t go back in time to change things, but you can alter the future. Apologize to him for not being as focused on him as you should have been. Make it clear that you are available when he wants to talk. Don’t push him to open up though. This usually makes men withdraw more.

A common reason a husband wants out of the marriage is related to family dynamics. Once the kids arrive, many couples stop being romantic partners and instead become co-parents. When this happens, the husband often feels abandoned. If the two of you have stopped acting like a couple in love and are now mostly discussing domestic issues and parenting, you need to change that dynamic. They need to make time for each other away from the rest of the family. It can be something as elaborate as a second honeymoon or even lunch together once in a while. Unless you make an effort to rekindle the closeness between you and your spouse, it won’t happen. Put your husband first if you really want to save the relationship and keep your family intact.