I’m running away. I’ve always been running away. However, I believe that running with enthusiasm towards something is much better than running away with fear and, although I still run unconsciously from dark places, now I practice more consciously running towards the light. What is your experience of running away? How often do you consciously practice running toward your goals? To what extent are you living your life on purpose?

While attending a spiritual retreat, I experienced one of those rare moments of true awakening. Despite being intensely goal-oriented at times, my awareness of a long-practiced habit of running away from situations intensified dramatically during one of the meditation exercises. I suddenly realized how many significant situations I had run away from: I ran away from home; I ran away from the church that was an anchor during my formative years; I ran away from a failed marriage; I ran away from numerous jobs that had become boring. It wasn’t always easy to get out and, when leaving somewhere, I always headed to another place but, too often, with no other purpose than to escape a bad situation.

Our lives are full of transitions. In these difficult economic times, many people have lost not only their jobs but also their careers. You may have lost your job, your spouse, someone or something that was a really important part of you. These losses often mean a loss of identity. When someone asks, “What do you do?” How do you respond: a former teacher, or a former executive, or a former something else? These are times when new identities can emerge. Identities can arise accidentally when circumstances force us to make decisions to generate income or find new friends. But wait. Who do you really want to be? What do you really want to do? This can be a perfect opportunity to discover and follow your true purpose.

I define purpose as the ‘Big Why’: why you are here, your reason for being alive. My friend and guide Richard Leider, in his book The Power of Purpose, writes: “Purpose is fundamental to human life. Purpose gives us the will to live or to persevere. It gives us the reason to get up in the morning. The purpose gives us be brave.” We all have a purpose, whether we know it or not. Have you discovered your purpose? Can you describe your purpose in ten words or less?

Discovering our purpose is important at any point in our lives, but as we move into the second half of our lives, knowing our purpose becomes increasingly important. During the first half of our lives, we are primarily focused on building a career, supporting our family, and accumulating assets. Then comes a period when our families become more independent, when our careers become less meaningful, and when some of our accumulated assets become liabilities. Our attics and garages fill up with stuff in storage because it’s easier to keep it in case we need it rather than consciously deciding to let it go. If we discovered our true purpose, we would know what to keep and what to let go.

During the second half of life we ​​become increasingly aware of our age. Middle-aged people rarely express their age willingly, but, as people move from the middle to the middle, they take pride in their age and share it like a badge of honor. During recent research interviews with people in the second half of life, where I always save demographics for last, it’s rare that my interviewees don’t proudly tell me their age long before we get to the end of the interview. A business leader transitioning from a full-time job told me the other day, “I’m so busy. I don’t know how I ever had time to get to work!” This former business leader is already living life on purpose. We cannot stop the passing of the years but we can age with purpose.

Not all of us are like that former business leader. Many of us struggle to find our way when these big disruptions in our lives occur. We feel too young to retire but don’t know where to look for new jobs or volunteer opportunities. We feel the loss of identity and the loss of direction. Exploring these interruptions and reflecting on other turning points in our lives provides a place from which to discover our purpose and begin living the second half of life with purpose. Aging with purpose is much more fun than getting old. Running towards our goals is much better than constantly running away.