I recently became aware of some powerful attractive forces that have been at work in my life for a long period of time.

Discovering the source of many of the problems in my life was a great moment of relief. I realized that an unconscious pattern of behavior, established in my youth, had been perpetuating many of my problems and difficulties.

When things start to appear in life that you are not satisfied with, you may get angry and try to push them away. But what if you are the cause of these situations and circumstances and they are trying to teach you something? What if pushing them away only attracts more of the same in your life?

There is a well known technical visualization related to sports called visual motor testing. In the movie The Secret, Denis Waitley talks about this technique that he used in the Olympic Games to train athletes.

When the athletes were told to mentally rehearse the action of their sports, the same muscles were activated in the same order as they would during an actual physical situation.

The mind did not know the difference between actual physical circumstances and visualization techniques. The things that we “see” and rehearse in the mind occur in reality as situations, events, and circumstances.

My problem was that I was rehearsing fighting with my brother. I was “trapped” in this “daydream” because that was how I remembered my brother after his death. It was the most powerful way to remember it.

I created a series of actual physical matches and got into martial arts a lot over several years.

When things continued to be difficult, frustrating, and conflicting in work life, I would withdraw from life and work entirely to avoid the pain associated with these feelings that I kept perpetuating.

I kept wondering why my life was so difficult. Isn’t this what most people experience in life? Why was everything so painful and emotionally draining?

Once I discovered this perception in my own mind, I was able to see the truth of what I was continually creating in life. I was angry and not at peace in my own mind. Therefore, I continued to perpetuate difficult and traumatic circumstances.

I’m sure a lot of people are doing this, creating adversity because it gives their life meaning and importance, in some way. How do you make yourself important at the expense of your peace of mind and happiness?

What visual images are you continually thinking about?

Many of my ‘daydreams’ were thought patterns that I was unaware of. It took a lot of pain and understanding for me to stop and closely observe my thoughts and emotional habit patterns.

I started meditating and stopped drinking alcohol. I started spending more time on positive habits and less time with people reinforcing angry and negative emotions within me.

This took some time. With regular daily meditation I became more aware of my thought processes. When I fell into a negative thinking pattern, I was able to realize it. Whereas for years I must have run these old programs on autopilot.

This process was like letting go of what you thought it was.

When you identify with a certain emotion, you begin to think that you are that emotion. You start to think that you are your thoughts. When there is nothing to fight against, large parts of your worldview disappear. It feels like you’re losing your mind.

Who are we without our problems and difficulties? They often define us and give us our identity. They give us a structure to hold onto!

When you become the observer, through learning meditation, you can notice what is going on inside you and realize how it controls your life.

So, if you spend a lot of time and attention on negative, angry, and difficult emotions, thoughts, and words, consider that you may be addicted to them. You may be giving yourself an identity to hold onto, because without it, you won’t know who you are.

Think about the friends you hang out with. Do you talk about things that annoy and frustrate you? To really change your life, you need to stop thinking and pay attention to the things that increase your anger and frustration. Stop spending time with people who make you angry and bring out those feelings of anger and frustration within yourself.

Learn to meditate and detach from your thinking. Learn to be the silent observer. There is power in being an observer and not always being the speaker who has to participate and react.

The law of attraction is a powerful force in life. If we are to learn how to use it properly to create more enjoyment and improve our lives, we must first become more aware of the thoughts and emotions that we are already experiencing. Without this awareness, we will continue to create more difficulties on an unconscious level and blame the law of attraction saying that it is not working. When it actually works. You still don’t understand how!