Fewer and fewer people are getting married. One third of marriages will not survive. Divorce has a huge impact on your life and the lives of your loved ones. You have to put everything to save your marriage. At least, as long as you continue to believe in marriage. But marital problems cannot be solved either.

We are happy to help you save your marriage. In this article, we explain 8 golden tips that can help you breathe new life into your relationship. You have been very happy with each other. With difficulty and attention, you can relive old times, but you have to do something about it.

Do you have marital problems or a normal relationship between a man and a woman?

In a healthy relationship, there are always differences of opinion and arguments. You are equal partners, each with his own opinion. It is impossible to always be on one line about everything.

In a relationship where there are never problems, there is probably a negative resignation, for example: “I’m not going to go into that anymore, because it doesn’t make sense.” There is a marital problem if it feels this way to one of the two partners. As soon as the situation within the marriage makes you unhappy, action must be taken.

Try everything to save the marriage

Get married for life. With marital problems, you have to do everything in your power to save the marriage, unless you no longer want to stay in the marriage. Before you start drawing conclusions, you need to be sure of your case. A divorce has a great emotional and financial impact. Not only for you, but also for the people in your life and of course, especially for the family. As long as it’s still worth it to you, you need to make sure that changes take place in your relationship.

A relationship is further deteriorated by a negative spiral

Married couples with marital problems end up in a vicious cycle. Because of the problems, even bigger problems arise. So something has to be done about it. Over time, marital problems become so severe that you will no longer be able to control them. The problem is usually that the problems of the wedding are not appreciated. This is also logical because the line between a period in which the marriage is a little more rigid and the actual marital problems is blurred. You can only resolve issues after they have been recognized.

Is couples therapy the solution?

You only go into couples therapy if you can’t solve problems on your own. Couples therapy does not work well for everyone. Your relationship can benefit you in the long run, but it can also strengthen negative thinking about your relationship. Unconsciously you will realize that now you also need therapy to keep your relationship alive. If you have to choose between divorce or couples therapy, it is, of course, an easy choice. You can try therapy as a last resort.

8 golden tips for solving marriage problems

How do you get out of this negative spiral? You should also let your partner think along with you. You need two people for a good marriage. An unfortunate couple already causes marital problems for both of them. Use the following tips to implement improvements immediately within your marriage.

Tip No. # 1: stop blaming and start building

There are many reproaches within a troubled marriage. Partners who want to work on their relationship must stop this. It’s good to express what you don’t like, but don’t do it in an angry (negative) mood. It is better to wait until a time when there is no mutual friction. Express what’s upsetting you in a way that doesn’t blame you. Stop blaming is the first step in breaking a negative spiral within your relationship. There is still a long way to go, but the first step has been taken.

Tip No. # 2: find the source of problems

There are probably more causes for your marital problems, but try to find out what the basis of the problem is. When and why did it arise? Marriage problems are often the sum of multiple complications, but there may be a real problem. This can be the annoyance by the lax attitude of one of the two, but it can also be caused by bad sex, for example. If you can discover the probable source of the problems, it will also be easier to do something about it.

Tip # 3: Also be open to your own mistakes and negative attitudes

Identifying problems with your partner will probably not cost you much effort. The next step is to face your own disadvantages and do something about them. The degree of guilt for problems within the relationship may differ, but both are actively contributing to the problems. Put on paper where you drop the stitches. Ask your partner in substantive conversation what you are doing wrong. Do you know your disadvantages? Then do something with him.

Tip No. # 4: lots of conversations

It will take a lot of conversations to progress alone. Take the time for this. Don’t expect a few conversations to be enough to get you back together. It’s best to schedule in-depth conversations every day or at least several times a week. Also, review the progress you have already made. Use the events of that day to analyze what could have gone wrong and how you can avoid it in the future.

Tip No. # 5: identify the strongest points of others

Cultivating goodwill together can do no harm. They are probably criticized often. You shouldn’t expect compliments on a broken marriage. Try to write down your partner’s strengths. Make a list and discuss it with each other. It’s nice to hear what your partner appreciates about you. It’s mainly about the character’s strengths.

Tip No. # 6: go back to the beginning

It is good to feel again what you have felt for each other in the past. Take both of you to the basics to see that you’ve had good times too. These may be images of better times, but another good way is to go on a vacation for two to the destination where your honeymoon was. Even remembering memories can be very effective. The point is, you don’t just think negatively about your marriage. The common goal should be to be happy together again. To do this, you need to realize what it’s like to have fun again in a relationship.

Tip # 7: do things together

Partners who live next door can take action by doing more together. For example, do odd jobs around the house or take a course together. Something in common must be rebuilt. A feeling of “us” must be re-created. This gives you a connection. You should get more deals than just two people living under the same roof.

Tip No. 8: Give Each Other More Space

There can also be relationship problems because they are too much on each other’s lips. In that case, they should not do things together, but rather seek relaxation. Always doing something together can actually be oppressive and suffocating. Let your partner know that you want to do more for yourself. Giving yourself space is different from avoiding yourself. In that case, other steps must be taken to bring the relationship back to health.

The councils will only work with the full cooperation of both partners. If your partner does not want to cooperate to improve the relationship, you are underestimating the problem or your partner has already left the relationship.

A healthy relationship ensures a happy life. A bad relationship causes stress, accidents and a lot of drama.