We are all living longer due to improved health and lifestyles. So ’till death do us part’ is much longer than it used to be centuries ago. Some couples like the idea of not being tied to another person for decades. But for most couples this is not an option and adultery is a guilty secret. Revealing infidelities can be unwise. Many people ask for an instant divorce.
Men experience much more sexual temptation than women. Women tend to take male sexual loyalty for granted without appreciating the struggle men face to avoid temptation (although many of these temptations do not represent true sexual opportunities). Some men want the opportunity to explore sex with different partners. They feel that having a lover severely limits their sexual freedom, which they see as a right. As men get older, they can appreciate the stability of a long-term relationship.
Women’s lack of sensitivity means they have much less to gain from casual sexual encounters. Since women have no sexual desire and are not aroused by sexual activity, they focus much more on the nonsexual aspects of relationships: companionship, love, and affection. These aspects depend on knowing and loving a person, which takes her time.
A woman is initially wary of what a man might do during a sexual encounter. She anticipates a man’s sexual drive to explore a woman’s body and initiate intercourse. Likewise, a woman feels powerless due to her own passivity in engaging in sexual activity with no motivation to do anything other than accept (or defend against) any activity initiated by a man.
Some women have a hard time saying no to male advances. They give up but later feel sorry. They resent the fact that society (mainly other women) judges against them because women don’t need sex like men. Women are naturally passive. Within reason, women should not feel ashamed of being seduced by men, but only aware of the risks they are taking. Knowing the facts of their sexuality is critical for women to gain some of the confidence that men have to face the world with their heads held high.
A woman is attracted to the mind of a man: his character, his behavior and his attitude. Women’s emotional drive does not depend on sex per se, but on feeling that a lover loves them (showing affection) and cares about them (showing interest). For most women, even the idea of sex is repugnant if they don’t feel emotional attachment to a man. Women get none of the physical gratification that makes sex so pleasurable for men.
Lack of confidence and self-esteem leads some women to experiment with casual sex for a while because they enjoy the novelty of being popular with men. Men find that women who are younger, less experienced, and of lower social status (either class or race) are more easily pressured into having sex. Women gain confidence with age, experience and when they have social status. When a married man has an affair, her wife is insulted that he has rejected her and chosen another woman. She may refuse to have sex for emotional reasons.
Men enjoy casual sex for the opportunity to experience firsthand the variation in genital anatomy and behaviors of a new partner. Far fewer women are interested in casual sex with multiple partners. Women are not turned on by sex like men. In the long term, women tend to seek a relationship: companionship, affection and support. Women appreciate the intimacy and reassurance of knowing someone well.
Sexually confident women, as portrayed in the movies, seem to expect a man to comply. This alleged sexual aggressiveness on the part of the modern feminist is just a political posturing that has no bite. Today’s men provide what they have always done: vaginal thrusting until male ejaculation. Women never complain. Women don’t know what else to ask for. And if they do, they don’t have the courage to insist on it. It is the same all over the world.
Since intercourse is the default heterosexual activity, it requires no communication. The novelty of casual sex means that a man is very aroused and wants to have sex as soon as possible. He doesn’t want to ejaculate too soon. There are few foreplay, which need more time for trust and communication to develop. Casual sex focuses on intercourse, which satisfies the basic sexual needs of a man and is quickly over for a woman.
Numerous research studies make it abundantly clear that the people who have the best quality and most frequent sex are married couples. That says a lot about the inadequacies of ‘casual sex’. (The Parrots 2009)
